Mis Hermanos- Part A

Empesemos por el mayor. Jose Luz, although he is known as Luz or Nono. El tiene sus treinta y tantos anos, casado con dos hijos. De todos nosotros, el es el mas rebelde. El que casi nunca obedecia a mi madre. Recuerdo que cada domingo, mi madre intentaba levantarlo para que fuera a misa. Jamas lo lograba salir, y al regresar de misa aun seguia en cama, dormiendo. Carino de parte de el jamas recibiamos. Cuando acabo la preparatoria, se fue a trabajar a san Luis, lo cual estaba a una hora de nuestro ejido a la pequena ciudad de villa de reyes. Nuestro ejido es Bledos. Cuando mi madre tomo la decision de venir a encontrar a mi padre, por ser el mayor, Luz la tubo que acompanar. El jamas tenia la intencion de hacer una vida por estos rumbos. Recuerdo que mi primo, Pillo, tambien se animo a acompanar a mi madre. Suerte no teniamos, y con cada decepcion, Luz perdia la fe y esperanza. El discutia con mi madre, y le decia que no tenia caso lo que intentanbamos. Como lo eh mensionado, el casi nunca nos demonstruo un gesto de carino nada mas por que si. Pero es mi hermano, y lo mas bonito que recuerdo es una occasion en la cual su compania me dio mucha paz. Era de noche, el coyote que mi mama contrato decidio cruzar a mi madre y a mi hermana primero. El coyote tenia a otras personas, pero jamas en todas las veces que habiamos cruzado, (fueron un monton!) se habia tardado como ese dia. El rio grande, para mi, era imenso, y una eternidad para cruzar. Esa noche, lo unico que recuerdo es que hubo un problema con la camara (the tube) en la cual yo y mi hermano teniamos que usar. El coyote tenia que parchar el abujero, y recuerdo tener miedo. Aunque no podia veer el otro lado del rio,por lo oscuro que estaba, sabia que mi madre y mi hermana ya estaban del otro lado. Recuerdo haber pensado que ya no hiba a veer a mi mama ni a mi hermana. Pero mi hermano, sin decirme nada, me aseguro que todo estaria bien.

Recuerdo haberme sentado y trataba de calendar mi cuerpo cullo casi no tenia nada puesto-mi mama nos habia quitado el vestido que teniamos y lo tenia con ella envuelto varias veces en bolsas de plastico para que no se mojaran al cruzar y poder ponernoslos cuando llegaramos al otro lado. Cuando la camara estaba lista, mi hermano me tomo en sus brazos y cruzamos. Al llegar al lugar donde estaba mi madre esperarandonos, recuerdo haber llegado sin querer de dejar a mi hermano, todo estaba muy oscuro y no lo solte hasta oir la voz de mi madre que me llamaba para poder vestirme. Luz, sabra que recuerdo esto? Sabra lo que el hizo por mi esa noche? Quizas no, y dudo que algun dia se entere. Pero con lo duro que es la vida.. horas despues, nos encontraron de Nuevo, y volvimos al principio. Con tantas veces que tratabamos y al no tener la suerte, mi hermano se fastidio, y decidio regresarse para Bledos, y cuando lo hizo, senti miedo por que para mi, Luz fue el que me quitaba el miedo. El me daba una paz, por que me sentia segura. Me imagino que al llegar a Bledos, mis abuelos lo reganaron por haber dejado a mi madre con nosotras dos sola. Cuando el decidio intentarlo de Nuevo, lo logro. Nosotros ya tambien estabamos viviendo con mi tio. Luz trabajo, para poder ayudar a mi madre y salir adelante, pero Luz aun no tenia intencion de hacer una vida por estos rumbos. Trabajaba en en construccion, un eficio comun entre los hombres que no tienen seguro social para trabajar. Luz fue deportado cuando estaba trabajando. Cuando mi madre recibio su llamada para avisarle lo occurido, ella le suplico que no se fuera para Bledos, que ella hiba a junar dinero para poder cruzarlo de Nuevo. Pero Luz, aun no vio el caso en estar en un pais extrano, donde no estabamos bienvenidos. Se fue de Nuevo, el tiempo paso y se caso. Vivio en la casa donde viviamos, y me imagino que mi cunada, Caretina, (who is known as La Ne) cuidaba de la casa que mi madre dejo y tambien mis dos hermanos que aun estaban jovenes para ser cosas en la casa.

Durante este tiempo mi hermano Francisco (known as Pancho) decidio dejar Bledos para poder venires a ayudar a mi madre. Pancho. I remember his first day here. It was late at night when my mom received the call that he was in town. She was so anxious to see him to make sure he was fine. Somewhere along the lines, a miscommunication happened. We were staying with an uncle and I was told by my mother to stay put in case he arrived. She took my sister with her and started walking, she wanted to go get him right there and then. She took off and a while later, Pancho was at the door. He looked tired, and hungry. I remember running to him, I grabbed his knees and held him. All he did was pat my back and asked where my mom had gone.

Pancho is the second oldest. But to tell you the truth he might as well be the oldest. Luz has always been somewhat lazy compared to the rest of my brothers. And hes always gone against my mothers wishes, like leaving us here and giving up trying to come across. We weren’t welcomed at my uncles house, and Pancho took notice of this rather quickly, he worked with a man, Isidro, I still remember his name! Isidro gave him a job, he had a truck where he sold fruit cups out of. Pancho also held odd jobs, and anything that would help my mom collect money. As things got worse at my uncles, my mom worked watching two kids at night, and my brother worked during the day. Soon they were able to gather enough money leave, so we did. But we moved so much that I don’t even remember how many schools we went to. We soon found a place on the West side of town. 2417 San Fernando St. And there Pancho and my Mother continued to work and keep the faith. Faith that we wouldn’t get deported I believe my moms faith was also that my dad would soon return to her, to us. My moms priority how ever were Ruben and Juan (known as Chepe) two of my brothers who stayed behind with my grandparents. Between my Brother and My mother they saved enough money to hire a coyote once again and have them bring Chepe and Ruben across to be reunited with us. My Mom was hesistant because they were still only 11 and 13 years of age, and to have them cross the border with complete strangers made her worry, so she asked my oldest brother LUZ to come with them, but of course if you recall, he married. My mom now had to save enough money to bring two more people aside from just Ruben And Chepe. So she did.

Luz had no problem coming now, since his wife was also coming. I remember my mothers tears the night they got here. Pure joy. She kept saying “por fin estamos completos” she couldn’t seem to stop huggin and kissing them. Lol.

I remember my mother being so worried about their arrival that she didn’t even cook dinner. When they got there, she didn’t have any food ready to feed them so she sent Pancho to go get popeyes chicken. LOL I remember the car ride. Pancho had bought this very old, very yellow impala. It was probably from the 1960’s. the inside was in very bad condition and it didn’t run when he bought it but he made it work and that hideous thing allowed us to go to the Laundromat with out having to drag or carry the hampers over ten blocks. Going for groceries was also easier. The heavy bags were no longer cutting our fingers or turning them red due to the lack of blood circulation. Anywho, we got into the that ugly car and we convinced CHEPE and RUBEN to go with us and I remember chepe throwing up as soon as we got to the window at the Popeyes. He got carsick. The car must have been too low to the ground, or it could simply be that he was nervous, who knows but he got car sick, and the popeyes chicken was only two block away. Lol.

So let me continue with Luz, he stayed and we (by we I mean, my mother, Luz, La Ne –his wife, Pancho, Simon, Chepe, Ruben, Alma, and myself) were all living in that 2 bedroom one bath house. We had two beds in each bedroom and the living room was also a bed room with two more beds. Even then we still had to share beds with one another. A sheet was the divider in the living room. While they stayed with us, Luz y La Ne had Esgardo, their first born son, my nephew. La Ne had a temper and often felt as if she was catering to the rest of my brothers not just her husband, and soon they decided to move. So they did. To Bartlesville, Oklahoma, a town on the border between the state of Oklahoma and Kansas. My mother took it pretty hard, she hurt mostly because she wasn’t going to see her grandson grow up. They lived up there, for about 7 years. We visited a few times and they’d come down as well, and it was nice. Until La Ne, felt the need to go visit her mother in mexico. She felt that if she went she could easily return to her life in Oklahoma. So they left for mexico.

They made a stop in san Antonio, and then my mother tried to knock some sense into them, simply to make them realize how hard it would be to attempt to cross over. More than seven years had gone by since they cross the border and it was hard then, many issues with immigration had come up and times were tougher. Border patrol was enforcing stricter rules and penalties, but Luz, once again ingonored my mothers pleas. They were in Mexico for two weeks, when they attempted to return, things didn’t work out the way they had imagine. My Parents picked up my nephew who is a born US citizen. He stayed with us while his parents made his their way to him. My brother, since being here had gain tremendous amount of weight,( he may weigh over 300lbs) and he was in no shape to attempt to run from border patrol in case the need for it came up. So they attempted and were caught. From what I hear, my sister in law tripped and hurt her leg so my brother ran back for her and both were deported, but before deporting them back to mexico, a series of fingerprints were taken from both of them. Through those fingerprints immigration found out that my brother had several DWI’s and had been in jail for fighting in bars.

When this came up in his record, my brother was told that he would be sent back to mexico, but that if he tried to cross again illegally and was caught, that hed spend 15 years in jail. Even if he made it, returned to his life here in the states, a simple traffic ticket could get him the same penalty. So he and my sister-in-law made the decision to return to Bledos. See, luz never really listen to my mothers advice or guidance. Out of all of my brothers he is the only one whos gotten in to trouble with the law. And the fact that I have little communication with him doesn’t help. But he is my brother and when I compare the life he had here to the life he leads now, it saddens me. My nephew was sent back even after my mom pleaded that he stay here in the states so that he may receive a decent education. Esgardo lived in mexico for about a year, and in that year he lost valuable education. You see, in Bledos, parents arent punished if the child isn’t in school, in fact very few children attend school. Most are in charge of collecting wood to sale from the “monte.” Others spend their day out feeding and caring for the farm animals, they live off of.

Luz, and his wife should have gotten on my nephews case for not showing up to school, but it was easily overlooked because neither of them really valued an education. I know that La Ne didn't want her son to be so far away, and I can only imagine what she thought when my parents propose that he come live with us - an entire world away from her. During that year of non-stop pleading done by my mother, Luz and La Ne finally came around. I think they realized that my nephew didn't need to pay for their mistakes. I admire them for making the hard choice of letting their son, at the age of eight, come to this country to obtain a decent education.

Esgardo visits his parents once a year, but when and if we have the resources to send him twice, we do. This past year, he spent Christmas vacation with his parents and his adorable little sister-my neice, Nancy Guadalupe Rodriguez. Those Cheeks!! That cute Smile! Don't let that fool you though, because this cute little person has a character on her. Esgardo looks forward to summer vacation, and although he may never be able to spend time with us during the summer, I don't complain because I can't imagine what he goes through. Last August, as I went to go get him before school was to commence, I finally realized how hard it was for him. He cried as we boarded the bus even after he'd promise his mom he wouldn't. Just remembering how the tears rolled down Luz's face brings tears to my eyes. It's hard but they know what is best for Esgardo. He is a star student in class. Never gets into trouble and is even part of the P.A.L.S. Program at his school. He is being raised by my parents and after having raised 9 of us, I think he'll turn out fine. Once a week he calls home, usually Mondays afternoon, and he tells his mom what he did that week. At times you may see him excited and like expected other times, the calls make him miss his family more. Hes constantly updating us all on how fast Nancy is growing. It reminds me of when I was a child, and we spoke to our Dad, and my brother who were at that time living here in the states.

I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason. God has our best interest at heart and as humans we often forget that it is not our will that shall be done but rather his. I am certain that Esgardo has a bright future and that my Brother and his wife's sacrifice will not be in vain. Today, as we waited at the Pizza Hut for our order, we had a chance to talk. I asked if he was ready for school to let out. Of course, what kid wants to be in school. But summer vacation is different for Esgardo, and although he too craves a break, from homework, getting up early and the uniform he wears, Summer means more to him than most kids. Summer means, he gets to see his dad, his mom, and his little sister. He gets to go home- because yes, Bledos is his home. He may be a born US citizen, but his home is where he is fully happy.